Audio Story: Petie’s Peanut Butter Pizza

story length: 6 mins, 51 secs
written by: Joan Winifred (Dedicated to My Peanut Butter Boy & his Cousin Petie)
read by: Chuck Brown

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.“Time for breakfast, Petie,” said Mother, “ I made scrambled eggs and toast.”

“Nope! Peanut butter,” said Petie. “Petie, please eat your eggs and toast,” she said.

“Nope! Peanut butter,” said Petie. “Petie, peanut butter for breakfast?” replied mother. “I don’t think so. Come eat your eggs.” Petie scrunched his face, shrugged his shoulders, and put his hands on his waist.

“Nope! Peanut butter,” insisted Petie. “Okay, peanut butter for Petie. At least drink some orange juice,” pleaded Mother.

After breakfast, Petie ran off to have an adventure with his favorite toys.

Petie was a quiet, smart boy of few words. Some might say Petie was hard to please, persistent, and picky…possibly even persnickety. The truth is Petie knew exactly what he liked and what he didn’t like. Petie liked dogs…but not cats. Petie liked basketball…but not baseball. Petie liked school…but not homework. Petie liked green…but not pink. Petie liked the number 8… but not the number 7. Petie liked circles…but not triangles. Petie liked shorts (even in winter)…but not pants. Petie liked sneakers…but not shoes. Petie liked candy…but not gum. Petie liked pizza parties… but not slumber parties. Most of all, Petie liked peanut butter, which he found positively perfect!

“Petie, lunchtime. Please put down your toys and come eat,” said Mother, “I made you a ham and swiss sandwich on rye with a garden salad.” “Nope! Peanut butter,” said Petie. “Petie, please eat your ham and swiss sandwich,” she said. “Nope! Peanut butter,” said Petie. She reasoned, “Petie, you had peanut butter for breakfast. Don’t you want something different to eat for lunch?” Petie scrunched his face, shrugged his shoulders, and put his hands on his waist. “Nope! Peanut butter,” insisted Petie. “Okay, peanut butter for Petie. At least drink some milk,” pleaded his partially-perturbed mother.

After lunch, Petie went outside. He had lots of fun chasing his dog, Sammy, around the back yard. Before long he heard Mother calling, “Petie, come in for dinner. Please be sure to wash your hands before you eat.” Petie left Sammy digging for a bone. He scrubbed his hands clean. “Here’s your spaghetti and meatballs,” she said. “Nope! Peanut butter,” said Petie. “Uh-oh, here we go again!” cried Mother, “You like spaghetti and meatballs!” “Nope! Peanut butter,” said Petie. She asked, “Aren’t you tired of eating the same food?” Petie scrunched his face, shrugged his shoulders, and put his hands on his waist. “Nope! Peanut butter,” insisted Petie. “Okay, peanut butter for Petie. At least drink some water,” pleaded Mother.

Day after day and week after week Mother would make healthy, nutritious food for Petie. She offered him lasagna, grapes, corn, macaroni and cheese, and bread. Day after day and week after week Petie predictably refused a dietary change. His favorite words became ‘Nope! Peanut butter.’ He had made his decision. He was sticking to it. Petie was perfectly happy eating peanut butter for breakfast, peanut butter for lunch, and peanut butter for dinner.

It made Petie powerful and popular! Word spread fast about the boy who consumed the same food every single day. The neighbors nicknamed him ‘The Peanut Butter Boy’. Wherever he wandered around the neighborhood a parade of children and squirrels followed!

Despite his popularity, Petie’s eating habits were becoming a problem. He was driving his mother nuts! He smelled like a giant peanut! (She feared he was growing into one.) At school, squirrels out-numbered the students! One by one, everyone, began eating Petie’s preference! Ms. Riley, his teacher, feared the worst. This addiction could spread to the entire school, the entire town. What would happen to the variety of well-balanced food served in the cafeteria or at restaurants? Meals would be boring and no fun. “How can I get the children to choose exciting, new foods?”, she wondered.

Mother received a notice from school. Petie’s class was having a pizza party. “Perfect!” thought Mother. Petie likes to cook. Petie likes pizza parties. Mother was thrilled. She hoped Petie would finally be sick of eating you-know-what and partake in some pizza. “Petie, please come help me make a pizza for your class’s pizza party tomorrow,” said mother. Petie popped into the room, wash his hands, and rolled out the dough. She asked, “Can you please put the tomato sauce on?” “Nope! Peanut butter,” said Petie. “Let’s put peppers on,” said mother. “Nope! Peanut butter,” said Petie. “How about pepperoni?” she asked. Petie scrunched his face, shrugged his shoulders, and put his hands on his waist. “Nope! Peanut butter,” insisted Petie. “Okay, peanut butter pizza for Petie,” said Mother.

Petie brought his pizza to the party. “Who wants a piece of Petie’s pizza?” asked the teacher. Petie raised his hand…and so did everyone else in the class. Ms. Riley let out a sigh of relief. Petie loved eating his pizza! Everyone loved eating his pizza! Even the teacher tried a slice. She said, “Mmm…Petie, your pizza is tasty and delicious!” Did you use a special sauce in your recipe?” “Nope! peanut butter,” said Petie.

The End.

MAKING PETIE’S PEANUT BUTTER PIZZA

You can make your own “Petie’s Peanut Butter Pizza”. (Remember to have your Mom or Dad help you!) Ingredients you need: Pizza crust dough; Peanut Butter (allergy warning: if you’re allergic to nuts please try another creative sauce); cheese; your favorite toppings such as pepperoni, peppers or mushroom. Items you need: Rolling pin, pizza pan. After you wash your hands, roll out the dough, lightly grease the pan, put the dough on the pan, put on the peanut butter (or your own special sauce), sprinkle cheese then add your favorite toppings. Now let Mom or Dad cook it! YUM!


FINICKY EATER SONG #1

“Yellowberry Jam”
Performed by Chuck Brown & The Chuckleberries
(visit their web site)

When I was young and came to eat
There were some foods that made me squeak
Hard to slip them quietly
‘Round the tongue into the tummy
Then my mama said to me
She had something especially
Good for food that’s hard to eat
Makes it all taste yummy

CHORUS
Yellowberry Jam, Yellowberry Jam
Comes in a jar, can’t find it in a can
Made down South by a guy named Sam
Got to have my Yellowberry Jam

It’s not too tart and not too sweet
Great with veggies and great with meat
Stir a little sauce, a topping or a dip
It’s extra good with chili
Not too spicy, not too bland
Lop it on a taco, glaze it on a ham
Scoop it on salad or dab it with fruit
Mix it up with macaroni

CHORUS

BRIDGE
Spinach, liver…Yellowberry Jam
Asparagus, broccoli…Yellowberry Jam
Brussels sprouts, mushrooms…Yellowberry Jam
Sauerkraut, yams….Yelllowberry Jam!

CHORUS

Now as my hair begins to gray
My own kids come to eat each day
Watch them squirming in their seats
Over foods made for their tummy
Then I tell them, “Yes, it’s true”
Here’s a secret just for you
For all the food that’s hard to eat
Makes it all taste yummy

CHORUS


FINICKY EATER SONG #2

“The Perfect Food”
Performed by Chuck Brown & The Chuckleberries
(visit their web site)

There’s a war goin’ on inside my brain
If this keeps up, I think I’ll go insane
A battle for supremacy is ragin’
There must be a victor…a true champ
Who gets their picture on a postage stamp
It’s the level of popularity I’m gaugin’
Who ya gonna vote for? What’s your favorite?
If they close the grocery store…whatcha leavin’ with?
What’s your choice for All-Time Perfect Food?
On the one hand, you’ve got ice cream
Cool and smooth and oh so fine
On the other is peanut butter
Spreadable, edible anytime
Which one’s mine?…I can’t decide

Now you can mix your ice cream with almost any favor
Why stop at 31?
There must be thousands you can savor
It’s great with chocolate, butterscotch or Tang
You scoop, you shape it, you swirl it all around
Toppings lightly sprinkled or piled into mounds
You can spoon it rather slowly or stir it into soup
It makes a great goop
Everybody screams….for ice cream

Now, George W. Carver was a man
I stand in awe…my hat in hand
When I ponder what his sense of vision wrought
Others were happy just to spread the fat
But he though there must be something better than that
It was a nutty idea that turned from tan to gold
There must be trillions sold
Peanut butter, you can spread it with ease
Top it off with jelly or with the fruit of bees
It goes great in a sack lunch
Whip it up in a Jif there, Skippy
And you’ll be flyin like old Peter Pan
There’s no better plan
Than bread and crackers and a tub of peanut butter
Grab your sisters, your brothers, your father and mother
Let’s have a feast…it’s neither last nor least
It’s roof-stickin’, spoon-lickin’ good….peanut butter

So dat’s the scoop…there’s two contenders
Which will you choose?…with either one we’re winners
Let’s take a vote and then…order in some pizza
Oh no, that’s three!…oh man, I need a brand new song
This one’s already runnin’ way to long
I gotta stop and make myself a major plan
Before this thing gets outta hand
But how to stop…what do I do, my friend?
Hmmm…The End